Picture Sam Altman, OpenAI’s big boss, slamming his keyboard as Mark Zuckerberg plays talent pirate, luring away his AI wizards with fat $100M bonuses. It’s a Silicon Valley soap opera—think Days of Our Algorithms. Altman’s fighting back with fiery Slack rants and promises of juicy stock options, preaching that his team’s AGI mission is holier than Meta’s. Grab your popcorn; this tech tug-of-war is spicier than a chili cook-off!