If you’ve ever panicked because you left your phone in an Uber, just be grateful you didn’t forget something weirder. This year’s Uber Lost & Found Index proves that we are a nation of highly distracted people—some so distracted, they left behind a live turtle, 175 hamburger sliders, and, perhaps most disturbingly, their divorce papers. You know it’s bad when your Uber driver ends up knowing more about your life than your therapist.

Uber’s lost and found items include live turtle, chainsaw